Beatle and Black Sabbath sigh, walking across the street. Beatle eyes a poster of the new alternate Transformers movie.
“What the hell, dude!?” laughed Beatle. “Ugh! I just loved it when Optimus killed Soundwave in that new alter movie!”
Black Sabbath nods. “Mhm. Anyway, remember the top of Hyatt Tower?”
“What?” asked Beatle. “We were on top? I hate standing on top of heights. Why would I be there, dude? Place is trauma. That’s where… Well… I died the first time.”
“Yeah, but remember WHAT HAPPENED, there?”
“Where?” asked Beatle.
“THERE!!!”
“Dude, you are not making sense.”
“Stop that.”
“What?”
“Stop evading the question.”
“Or, maybe I’m tryna protect you.”
“How the hell would you be protecting me right now!?”
Beatle shrugs. “Ah… I like the stars…”
Black Sabbath shakes her head. “Whatever, man.”
They silently walked.
“Did it mean anything?” asked Black Sabbath.
Beatle stays silent.
“On the tower. Did what happen mean anything?”
Beatle’s phone rings. “Sorry, dude. It’s Aph.”
“Beatle-!” Black Sabbath grabs his hand. “Listen… I-...”
Beatle turns to the road, seeing a child is about to get struck by a truck. He tries blitzing forward but Sabath immediately punches the truck, causing an entire traffic crash. Cars crash upon each other, tearing their snouts into pieces as smoke and burning tires entered everyone’s nose.
Beatle facepalms.
Black Sabbath gives a thumbs up, smiling. “Kid’s okay!”
“YOU COULD’VE KILLED SOMEONE!!!” yelled one man.
“BOOO!!! YOU SHOULD’VE LET BEATLE-!!!”
“Hey! She did the best she could. Lay off her, man!” yelled Beatle.
“Sorry, sir,” said the man, as everyone went off to work and the Athenas, local tiny ant women that work as Maharlica’s staff, began their clean-up, fixing the mess of the debris and towing away the cars.
Sabbath rolls her eyes and walks away.
A paint can nearly crashes onto her head but Beatle shields her with his body, causing her to blush.
“You okay?” asked Beatle.
Black Sabbath began laughing.
“What?” smiled Beatle.
“I remember you totally failed protecting me that one time and instead got us BOTH WET!!!” she giggled.
Beatle smiled softly and even chuckled a bit. “Yeah. That was 800 years ago…”
“Anyway… Uh… I had sex with some guy last night,” she smiled. “It was fine.”
Beatle frowns. “Uh-huh.”
“Mhm. I know. Guy sucks, right?”
“Mhm,” Beatle walks away with annoyance laid on his shoulder.
“Beatle, wait. I-I-I just wanted to SAY that it was like a jokey little-...”
Beatle flies off, creating a sonic boom. But, he lands back, trying to speak, turning to her.
“What… What’s wrong?” asked Black Sabbath.
“I’m sorry. Never mind. I’m late for Aph.” Beatle flies, creating a gush of wind that puts some dust in her eyes, causing her to wipe them clean.
The next day…
Sabbath has a stye, now with an inflamed eyelid; she applies tobramycin on her eyelid.
Suddenly, she hears a cooing sound outside her window.
If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.
Sabbath sighs and takes out a bat. “Fuckin’ space pigeons.”
She tries to swat them away, only to see a giant Pigeonman stepping inside.
Sabbath backs away.
“Crrrooo!!! Message for Sabbath from the CRRROOO Kingdom of Akteon!” he spoke.
She gets the letter and reads it. “My HELP!?!?”
“You are the greatest pilot of the Multiverse.”
“LIVING pilot. The greatest pilot was the original Sabbath and she’s dead. Fuck, Akteon’s on the other side of the world. I need a Pantheon to get there.”
Later…
Aphrodite smiles, as Black Sabbath begrudgingly leaves the portal and Beatle just follows after with Aph. Aph smiles and allows Black Sabbath to close the portal.
Aph offered a handshake. “Hey. I heard you used to be nicer when you guys were in college.”
“Kindness is transactional, lady. It’s what Christ would’ve done.”
Beatle sighs. “Honestly…”
“Mhm,” affirmed Sabbath, almost keeping quiet from the draining wrath she has for this situation.
The trio is now on a snowy distant horizon, with blizzards constantly crushing all. There, at the end, they see a small city colonized by strange Cavemen wearing various armors similar to the Spartans. Mercenaries, zealots, all the same kind: The Akteonites. Their culture was very brutish and boorish, sporting hairy bodies and masculine body odors even for the women. They were massive, tall, almost the size of Beatle, and absolutely strong. They rode T-Rexes for steeds and ate Mammoth pemmican and meat.
Sabbath looks at the distance.
Beatle speaks to a brutish-looking warrior.
“Excuse me,” said Beatle. “I can sense you are someone of vital importance. Could you please tell me the exact street names of that area on the way to the palace? Like, list ‘em all down, please. A-A-And is the um… Like the city hall. Before or after the-?”
Black Sabbath intervenes to save him. “How do I get to the palace? Are there any landmarks we would take note of?”
“I was getting to that-...”
“Just shut up,” said Black Sabbath.
“Near the bakery,” said the brutish warrior.
“Of course! The bakery is the medieval town’s heart!” smiled Beatle. “Thank you, kind Shepherd!”
“How’d you know he was a shepherd?” asked Black Sabbath.
“He has those tangles on him clearly made of wool and it doesn’t seem to have a brand. Place is known to brand their items, slaves even. So… No brand. He made the product himself and harvested it himself. Duh!” smiled Beatle.
Black Sabbath chuckles softly, causing Aphrodite to roll her eyes in annoyance.
Beatle, Sabbath, and Aphrodite reach the court, and there, they stood before the King, Unter Lightning.
“Unter Lightning,” Beatle bowed while Sabbath instinctively did so, but Aphrodite realizes they were bowing and politely tried to fix her mistake by bowing, though a little too late. “I am Beatle Saint King. May I present to you, the savior of your town, my first lieutenant and most proud warrior, Black Sabbath.”
Aphrodite smiles and pushes Sabbath forward.
Sabbath scoffs. “The fuck, bitch?” she asked.
Sabbath turns to the tall King, who stomped down the staircase before her.
He was almost Neanderthal-like, with a sloping head and a jawline the size of two fists with hair of an ape all over his body similarly to a pelt of some kind. He lowered from the staircase. One left leg, one left arm, and his right arm and leg are replaced with cannons.
“I am Unter Lightning. Back in the day, back when the Americans first got here, I was raised by my kind father, an alchemist who helped toy with life for a company known as Colossus. Few years later, while being sprouted like a damned pea in the lab, the war broke out, and you of all people came into the lab and decimated the scientists I called my family since you believed what they were doing was inhumane. Albeit, your forces were the ones who did so, you, Sabbath, caused the attack’s command. Soon, the Americans came. A cult of sorts and they enslaved us. We were enslaved. We were starved and made to suffer by the damned Human Devils and were forced to feast on the flesh of rats. Soon after, you attacked again and you freed all you could, but then my father and I were not saved by your forces. I don’t know if you were avoiding me or what, but I starved. We starved. Soon after, I buried my father, cut him open and ate his warm flesh to survive the cold winter’s frostbite your Saint King unleashed to this world. Well, now I am King of the Cavemen of Akteon. And what, pray tell, are you here for?”
“The… Love Doves…”
“I destroyed them. MacJovial’s armies? That I did. Tell me, again, why the bloody hell are ya here?”
Black Sabbath turns to Beatle in fear, and Beatle just smiles and shrugs.
Unter kept descending the staircase.
Beatle’s eyes widen. “This is a trap, huh? Set up by Mac so we could-?”
“Face me? Ah. Maybe.”
“I didn’t sense you…”
Unter smiles. “I call it Lightning Eyes. Usog that allows me to bend not only the electricity around me, but the minds of fools like you.”
Beatle warps out his Cain Marker.
“Ah! I see what you’re doing, there!” smiled Unter.
“Dude… It was a war.”
“Ah, Saint King. Far too much of a pussy to intentionally take a life, I see?” smiled Unter, facing Beatle. Unter is 20 feet tall, and Beatle is 18 feet.
“Look at ya! Cowering in almost humorous fear!” smiled Unter, grabbing Beatle’s shoulder.
Beatle is frozen by the Lightning Eyes, his Usog, causing Beatle to puke almost instantly.
Unter grabs Beatle by the throat but Black Sabbath immediately tries to cut him with her bladed feathers, yet Unter just smacks her away.
“Aph…” said Beatle, but Aph is frozen in place.
Unter sneers. “Pantheons have no power here, Beatle… Severed her connection to the Earthrealm with pure… faith. Faith in my one true God.”
“I am the Saint King!”
“Clearly, you lacked,” said Unter, punching Beatle in the stomach and crushing his ribs. “YOU. FUCKING. LACKED!!!” He crushed his ribs with one punch upon each period of that sentence. He pulls out a bloody fist. He grabs Beatle by the throat and slams him to the wall. “Though, alas, what I cannot understand is why are you still HERE. You and your variants… Or in OTHER WORDS… YOU… HAVE SINGLE-HANDEDLY DOOMED THE ENTIRE MULTIVERSE!!! And you dare try to FUCKING COLONIZE MY PEOPLE!??!” Unter beats Beatle in the face and into the ground. “What was born from your so-called righteousness is A MONSTER!!! GRASPING FIRMLY WITHIN THE RAGE OF MY HEART!!!”
Beatle whimpers. “Sabbath… Only Aphrodite can get us outta here… Please…”
Black Sabbath could only hear the beating in her ears.
“SABBATH!!!” roared Beatle. “DUDE!!!” He whelped.
Though, she decides to angrily and furiously tackle Unter, beating him over and over, though her punches are noticeably weaker, lacking the shockwaves she usually pulls out from each strike. Suddenly, she is unable to move herself, as the energy, the electricity in her muscles jolt her flesh and allows Unter to puppeteer her.
Sabbath cries, as Unter cruelly snaps Beatle’s neck, as he fell to the ground, limp.
Sabbath roars in pain as Unter lets her go, and she hugs his lifeless body. The blue glow from his goggles goes out, and Sabbath sobs, cradling him in her arms.
Unter sighs. “That man would have been the death of us… I did you a favor.”
He swayed his hand and his soldiers threw them both into a portal, into the cold snow, where Sabbath held Beatle’s lifeless body, ot… was it…?
A faint glow escaped from Beatle’s goggles. Sabbath cries and immediately hugs him, and,... kisses him.