"Alma, Alma!" The sound of my name filled the air and shattered the stillness that had hung over the woods just moments ago. For a split second, I thought about ignoring the cries. A part of me, the selfish part, just wanted to focus on the river as it drifted lazily along. But I couldn't let the selfish part win.
This was after all one of the few times when I had full control over my choices and actions. I tore my gaze away from the gentle, serene river with some effort. Blake was racing up the hill towards me. I could see the fear in her eyes, even though the rest of her face carried Blake's default, disinterested and unbothered expression. got to my feet and rushed down the hill to meet her. If Blake of all people was acting like this, things must be really bad. My feet carried me quickly and carefully down the side of the slippery hill.
"Sadie?" I asked, upon reaching Blake. She nodded. We were both running now. Trees and fields became a dull brown blur around me as we flew across the land. "How bad is it, Blake?"
"I'm not sure. But I thought I should let you know." Blake couldn't quite keep the fear out of her voice. I pushed myself forward. Memories filled my mind of that one night. That had been the worst it had ever gotten for Sadie. There had been nothing I could do for her. No matter how hard I tried to soothe and control her, I couldn’t. It had just been too dangerous. But I still felt guilty for doing what I did to poor Sadie.
"How long has it been?" I asked.
"You should have told me the moment things started to look bad," I said. Blake didn't answer. She just gave me that stupid glare which made not slapping her in the face a bit of a challenge for me. Well, I had learned my lesson. I was never going to do anything stupid like this ever again. Peaceful times gave me no excuse to let my guard down.
Our small shack emerged out of the fog. It had once been brightly colored. But the wind and the rain had peeled all the color off. Now, it was a dull grey that melted into the fog. It was also half covered by brambles and ivy. There really was nothing you could do to stop that dang ivy from devouring everything in its path. We dashed up the path and through the semi-rotten door. I could hear the screams now. Vera sat by the small window, her back turned to us. Drops of dark red blood ran down her pale arms and dripped to the floor.
"Vera, are you alright? What did you do with Sadie?" I asked. Keeping the fear out of my voice was hard. I fought to keep my tone gentle. If I were Vera, how would I want someone to speak to me? But my efforts were in vain. Vera didn't look up. Her back remained turned to us, and her eyes remained pale and empty.
"Vera! We're talking to you!" Blake burst out. It was no use. There was nothing anyone could do when Vera had that look on her face. She probably didn't even realize that we were there. "Vera! Answer me!" Fists clenched, Blake leaped towards her. But Vera didn't even flinch.
"Stop that, Blake. It's not helping. Just show me where you put Sadie," I ordered. Hesitation crossed over Blake's face. She looked from me to Vera and back again. Her dark eyes glittered with a defiant anger. No, not now. She couldn't be serious, right? "Please, let's just get this over with. This is nothing more than a waste of time," I said. More sharp screams filled the air, coming from deeper into the shed. That did the trick. Blake lowered her fists and left poor Vera to stare into the fog outside.
Sadie's howls were growing louder and louder with each second. It was so hard to believe that those awful, bloodcurdling moans and screams belonged to Sadie of all people. I had never heard anything like this before. My heart was racing now. What if this was it? What if we had actually lost Sadie this time? I shook myself. We didn't know anything for sure yet. It was good to be prepared for the worst outcome, but it might not have to come to that.
"I tried to stop her from attacking Vera, I really did," Blake was saying. "But I've never seen Sadie like this. I wasn't prepared. She's gotten stronger. Every time this comes over her, she gets stronger." Well, that explained the gash and cuts on Blake's face.
"That's true for all of us. We all get stronger after each attack," I reminded her.
"I ended up knocking her out and locking her in the supply closet. But she came to very quickly. I thought it would be over by then. But as you can hear, it's still going on."
"Okay. Thank you for getting me." We had reached the supply closet. "I'm going in. You block the door, okay?" I said.
"Okay, be careful." Hm, what did careful mean when it came to something like this? I had my pocketknife and in theory I could use it. But that was hard to imagine. No matter what she did, I would always think of Sadie as the confused teenager who had found herself separated from her parents and stuck in a quarantine zone. Even as I stepped into the room, I thought of that. Sadie was sitting in the corner, clawing at her own face. She leaped to her feet and lunged at me without any hesitation. Even now, I could see traces of fear and confusion in her eyes.
Relief filled me. She couldn't be lost. This was still little Sadie. I didn't fight back as she flung herself at me. The impact sent me flying to the ground. Her screams grew louder still as she pinned me to the ground with more strength than I had been prepared for.
"Sadie," I couldn't let my voice shake. This was a time to sound as calm and gentle as possible. "You're in there somewhere. Please come out. Don't you remember me?" I winced as she dug her nails into my skin. Foam and drool dripped from her mouth. But she was holding my gaze. She was hearing my words, even if she couldn't understand them. "Don't be scared. I'm not going to hurt you." Scared, that was all that she was.
This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.
It was always fascinating to watch the light return to someone's eyes as the attack faded away. At first, Sadie just looked slightly more focused. Then a warmth and a recognition spread across her face. I couldn't help but smile at the joy in her eyes.
"Alma!" she exclaimed. "There you are! I-I was having an awful dream where..." she trailed off as all energy left her voice. "It happened again." Now her voice was a soft little whisper. I sat up slowly and put my hand on her shoulder.
"It's over now. You're back with us and that's what matters, Sadie." I could feel her shaking.
"W-what did I do? Are you hurt? Did I hurt you?" Tears streamed down her cheeks, mixing with the blood and dirt that already covered her face.
"No. You hardly scratched me. I'm okay, honestly."
"W-well... what about the others?"
"I'm not sure yet."
"I-I'm sorry... I-I don't..." She buried her face in her hands and began to sob softly.
"It's not your fault, Sadie. Just like when I experience an attack, it's not fully my fault. We've all had our fair share of attacks. We know you can't control it." I put my arm around her shoulder.
"Why is it always me who does the most damage?" she sobbed. "It just gets worse and worse with each time!" Her sadness was turning to panic. "How much longer do you think I have left, Alma? I-it just keeps getting worse and worse! When will that day come? When will I close my eyes and never wake up?"
"Hey, don't think about that. It's no use. Just focus on what's right in front of you now," I whispered. I was talking to myself as well as to her. "Did you hurt yourself badly? Can you walk?"
"Y-Yes. I'm just a little scratched," she sighed and stood up slowly.
"Well, that's good then. Come on, let's get you all cleaned up." I smiled at her brightly as I could. Sadie didn't smile back.
"Why do things have to be like this? Why did we all have to fall sick?" she was muttering.
"Again, thinking about that doesn't make the situation better. It just makes you feel worse, Sadie." She opened her mouth to say something else, but she was interrupted by Blake.
"Hey! Sadie! Can you hear me? Are you back to normal? Do you have any idea what you did?" Blake demanded. "How many windows did you shatter again? Ah, yes, all of them! I already hate it here, but you seem determined to make it even worse!" Blake shouted, flinging the door open.
"I-I'm sorry," Sadie whispered. Her shoulders slumped and she hung her head. Blake's eyes were glowing with pure rage. She had been acting a little off all week. Perhaps she was on the verge of experiencing another attack herself. I stepped in front of Sadie and glared back at Blake.
"Stay back. You aren't helping, Blake," I began. The anger in her eyes grew more intense. Why did she have to always make things harder for me? But to my relief, Blake stepped aside and let us through. Vera was exactly where we had left her. A sharp cry escaped Sadie upon seeing her.
"D-did I do that?" she gasped, pointing at the wound on Vera's arm.
"Yes, Sadie. Don't worry, I'll fix her up in just a little bit. Come on, I think you could use some fresh air." I led her out of the shed and up the slope towards the river. We didn't have running water in the shed. Sadie clung to my hand like a terrified child the entire time. But she relaxed a little when she noticed the river.
There really was something magical about this old river. I completely understood why Vera spent hours doing nothing but watching it flow by. The deep blue water rippled along slowly and sleepily. It was so relaxed and unbothered. I loved this river because it was everything that I wasn't.
"W-what will the inspectors do to me when they visit next week?" Sadie sobbed.
"Nothing. Don't worry, we'll have this mess cleaned up in no time. They'll never know what happened."
"B-but I keep getting worse. What if they take me away? What if they lock me up in some dark room somewhere far away?" she whispered.
All I could do was pat her on the back and hum softly. When she got to this point, it was best to let her get all the emotions out of her system.
"We won't let anyone take you away, Sadie."
"You won't! But I bet Blake and Sadie would be happy to get rid of me! I can't even blame them after all the awful things I've done to them!"
"We've all done awful things to each other. We all experience the attacks. It's not just you. Now hold still, I need to clean that cut on your arm." Sadie winced as I began scrubbing at the cut. "You, me, Blake, and Vera, we all take turns being awful to each other. Come on, it's the story of our lives. Besides, Blake's awful to everyone all the time. She doesn't need anyone other than herself to be a complete menace," I added. At that, a small smile appeared on Sadie's face and a soft laugh escaped her.
Now I could see the tiny traces of the cheerful little Sadie I had once known.
"I'm sorry. I know whining about this doesn't help. But I'm always afraid. The attacks keep happening. There's nothing I can do to stop them! I know that everyone experiences this too, but I was the first to get sick! That means I'll be the first to lose myself! I’ll become a completely mindless, soulless zombie!" She burst into tears afresh. I slipped my arms around her and pulled her into a tight hug.
"Okay, okay, just let it all out." The two of us spent a few minutes just sitting there by the river. Sometimes there really was nothing you could do but cry.
"Thank you, Alma," Sadie said at last. "I-it's hard to imagine things being any worse than they are, but I know things would be harder for all of us if it wasn't for you," she whispered. My grip on her hand tightened. Those words made everything a little bit easier. Even if they weren't true.
"Are you ready to go back? I still need to help Vera," I whispered.
"Oh, yes, of course. I'm sorry, let's go!" Sadie let go of my hand and began making her way slowly down the side of the hill. She was just a small, pale speck sliding down the slope. It was hard to fully believe what she was capable of. No matter how many times she attacked, I could only remember her as Sadie. This Sadie.
Of course, I understood Blake's fear of her and Vera's fear. It was reasonable and I didn't blame them one bit for their reactions. But sometimes they acted as if they had forgotten who she had once been. My mind was drifting back now. If only there were a way to go back to when we had all first met. Being diagnosed had been hard. Having to leave home had been equally hard. But having friends to share the pain with had been easier. Well, we were still together. But were we friends or enemies? I couldn't be sure.
"About twenty minutes," Blake whispered. Oh, my goodness. I swallowed my angry lecture. This was why I couldn't leave Blake in charge. I shouldn't have left this morning. But things had been going so, so well for everyone. Everyone had been feeling better.