“I’m sorry,” said the girl in the blue dress. “I owe you, and because of that I won’t end you.” With that, the girl dug her blade into Ruby’s leg. Ruby’s eyes closed as jolt after jolt of pain exploded through her. Her vision blurred and for a moment she thought everything was over. Her stats appeared once again. She had lost 40 health points. The doll yanked Ruby’s sack out of her trembling hands and took the cloth as well as Ruby’s dagger. “If nobody else finds you, you should live and make it to the next round. Your overall ranking will be pretty low, but you’ll still level up,” the doll was saying.
Ruby wanted to scream and shout. She wanted to at least say something to the girl. But her anger and pain swallowed up her thoughts before they could become words. Without another word, the doll left Ruby lying alone in the alley. Darn it. The pain seemed to grow more intense with each breath that Ruby took. Well… at least she had gained a power. She was probably never going to get to use it again. That tiny little bit of triumph had felt good while it lasted.
Robert had told her many times about how important focus was to casting spells, especially when it came to healing spells. There was no way she could fix herself with all of this pain burning through her. The spell itself had been much easier than Ruby had expected it to be. According to Robert, dolls were much easier to heal than humans who were made of flesh and blood. He had tried to explain a few spells that were used to heal humans, but Ruby had never been able to follow them.
Maybe if Ruby waited long enough, the pain would fade, and she could focus enough to heal herself. Hopefully no one would find her here. Next time she helped someone, she would leave as soon as they were healed. Should she help other players? She wanted to. Even though she still felt anger towards that one doll, she understood why the girl had done what she did.
There had been something so wonderful about seeing that girl healed and hopeful again. All that helplessness had vanished with the cracks and chips. Was this how Robert had felt after he fixed Ruby? Maybe. It was a delightful feeling. Right now, there were only two things in the whole world that Ruby wanted. She wanted the pain to go away, and she wanted to savor this feeling of satisfaction that her new power had brought her. After all, it wasn’t like there was much else for her to do now. So, Ruby closed her eyes and pretended that she was somewhere far away. Would Robert be proud of her if he could see what she had done?
Yes, she decided. He would be. A smile touched Ruby’s lips. She had no reason whatsoever to feel happy right now, but she did. Joy and pain mixed into a thousand emotions that Ruby couldn’t even begin to describe. There was no telling how much time Ruby spent lying there. She lost track of time very quickly. Every once in a while, she would hear footsteps walking past the alley. Then her joy would briefly turn to fear. But nobody entered the alley and discovered her. Hope began to swell up in Ruby’s mind. Maybe she could make it through this first round. The hope grew as her pain slowly began to fade away. The shadows were growing darker and deeper all around her now. Was night coming?
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Ruby waited until her leg was totally numb to try healing it. Her eyes closed as she crossed her hands, and that warmth returned to her. Robert was with her once again. His voice guided her through the words of the spell for a second time. All the pain in her leg faded as the cracks seemed to vanish into thin air. Triumph and a sense of power made Ruby happily leap to her feet. Instantly, she stumbled back to the ground as a wave of weariness hit her like an arrow. Wow, these spells really drained her. Her health was back at 100, but her stamina had taken a real hit. Alright, it was time for her to focus on saving energy.
Ruby would need some of her energy for the walk back to the apartment. Now she found herself wondering how Ivy and Mia were doing. Hopefully they were both still intact. Ivy seemed to be pretty experienced, so that was good. Thinking of them lying in pieces in a different dark alley made Ruby wince. No, she wasn’t going to let herself think of those awful things. They would be fine. Why did she care so much? Maybe she cared too much. She had no reason to care about them. Neither Mia nor Ivy were her friends. They were nice enough, but they weren’t her friends. So, why did she feel so worried about them? Ruby barely knew them.
She did care too much. Was there a way to stop herself from caring? But she wanted to care. This game was clearly built to kill care. Survival was all that mattered in this beautiful nightmare. That was simply how things worked. Anger, revenge, kindness and love lost meaning in the face of survival. The more Ruby thought about it, the more she wanted to care. Caring was something she could do that a soulless object could not do. Caring was something she could choose to do. It was her way of rebelling. Perhaps the overseers wanted her to be nothing more than a cold shell who did what she was meant to do.
She would cling to what little freedom she had left by caring with all of her heart and soul. Even if she won, she would still be a prisoner. The loop would go on. At the end of the day, the strongest and weakest alike would lose. Besides, she wouldn’t have gained that power if she hadn’t stopped to help that doll. A loud ringing pulled Ruby back to reality. The sound was followed by Mary’s painfully cheerful, sharp voice.
“Round one is officially over!” she chirped. “Congratulations to everyone who made it to this point! Your level will be adjusted tomorrow morning, and our highest-ranked players will also receive their prizes!” Ruby had done it. The first round was over. Was she dreaming? This all felt too good to be true. Of course, she did know that she was nothing more than a little glass pawn, playing along with everyone else. But for a moment, Ruby felt totally and completely unstoppable. She had already done so much more than she had thought she’d be able to do. From now on, she was going to cling to this feeling of power. She would listen to all the sweet lies that she told herself and she would care with all of her heart.