“Can’t you sleep?” Tania asked Ana, who was staring up at the stars in the night sky above the city of Chaco.
A day had passed since Rodrigo and the others had arrived in the city. After almost a month with barely any rest, they had finally been able to recover while wandering through the bustling streets of the great city.
Tul and Tania had been visiting food markets, where the rabbit goddess delighted in tasting the many corn dishes so famous in that part of the world. Tul’s body had finally filled out again, and she had recovered her original figure.
Money had, essentially, been a huge problem. Ana had thought gold would be accepted as currency anywhere in the world, but many people there despised gold, considering it “the excrement of gods.” Fortunately, Tul had cacao beans, which were highly prized in that part of the world, and with them they had been able to barter in the various markets.
Freyja, meanwhile, had been asking around about blacksmiths who might be able to repair totemas, since hers was still broken, as was Ana’s. Under normal circumstances, totemas can repair themselves like living organisms, but the damage caused by Anat’s attacks had been so brutal that the help of a blacksmith was necessary.
In Yggdrasil, the dwarves of Nidavllir could easily repair such armor, but metallurgy in this part of the world was not as advanced. In the end, at one of the city’s sacred enclosures, similar to the kiva where Epona was, though smaller, the priests claimed they could revive both totemas, but the ritual would take about five days, one day longer than Epona’s treatment. Freyja agreed, seeing that she had few other options.
“It was foolish stubbornness for you to try going farther south with that dead totema,” Menrva had said at the time, seeing that Freyja’s armor was still broken and damaged.
Either way, we would have had to stay here, since with Ana’s totema and mine in that state, we would only have been a burden, the Norse goddess thought with a disappointed look.
Ana, meanwhile, had stayed in the room together with Loki and Susanoo. The eastern god did not care much about seeing another city, so on the roof of their quarters he had been practicing with his katana, unwilling to break the habit of training.
Ana could not stop thinking about Epona and Rodrigo. The goddess kept recalling the fact that she had been able to invoke Excalibur twice, yet now she was no longer capable of manifesting it. She remembered that the sword had appeared before her in a moment of courage. The problem was that the first time, it had happened when she herself spoke about protecting Rodrigo... and about loving him.
Do I love Rodrigo? she kept asking herself as she lay on the mat she used for sleeping. Loving someone was not something she had wanted, or even imagined, for herself. Yes, she had had some affairs when she was younger, but what happened with Dagda had made her repress all desires for love and sex.
Was Tania right? Was the idea of Rui living with us originally mine? she wondered.
She was sure that at first it had only been compassion, seeing the boy in a situation that reminded her of her own life.
Then why? When did it happen? she kept asking herself.
Then there was what Loki had told her.
Did he really feel something for me, or did he only want me, like most of the men I’ve known? she kept wondering. But the very idea of even touching Loki filled her with revulsion. Deep down, even though she appreciated the effort he had made, especially when they faced Anat, she still felt contempt toward him.
Rodrigo, Anpiel, and Menrva had gone to the markets to buy provisions and items that might be useful for the journey. Thanks to the cacao beans, they had been able to buy quite a few things, especially fruit and meat.
“So this is the famous xi’im Tul was talking about?” Anpiel asked upon seeing the ears of corn in one of the stalls.
“Yes. Tania told me she and Tul ate it in Cahokia, and that it is the most common and popular vegetable in this part of the world. Something like wheat in Europe,” Menrva replied.
The woman selling the goods, though she understood nothing the young gods were saying, took an ear of corn and roasted it over the fire. Once it had browned, she gave it to Menrva to try, and the Etruscan goddess was delighted by the taste.
“This is delicious!” she said, passing it to her friends. They all realized how exquisite the food was.
Then the woman stripped the kernels from another cob and, through gestures, showed the young gods how to prepare dough from the grains. She also gave them some little corn cakes, which amazed the whole group. Then she explained the process of nixtamalization, which none of them understood, but Tul guessed what she meant as the vendor showed them the corn grains cooked in a jar full of dark water, which turned out to be ash.
Finally, the woman took some corn kernels and dropped them into a clay pot over a lively fire. The kernels began to burst open into rosettes of corn. Rodrigo tried them and was equally amazed.
“Now I see why it’s so popular,” Menrva said in wonder as she tasted the delicious things the woman gave them. The goddess bought about thirty ears of corn and paid the woman with cacao beans. The woman blessed them, and the gods continued their shopping.
In the other markets, Rodrigo stared curiously at the silverware the merchants sold, which was very beautiful. There were also black-and-white jars with very curious geometric figures, as well as the strange masks used by the soldiers and priests. The young man decided to buy Epona a small silver necklace with a little sun pendant.
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Everyone met again at the guest house in the afternoon, where they talked a little more, and eventually went to sleep. But since Ana had slept most of the day, she had no sleep left in her and went up to the roof to watch the stars. That was where Tania found her and sat down beside her.
“Do you know the constellations, Tania?” the dark-haired goddess asked her friend without taking her eyes off the sky.
“I know the Canaanite interpretations of them, which are somewhat different from the ones used now,” Tania replied a bit sheepishly. “But I do know some of them, since in order to be accepted as a physician, one must know a little astrology.”
“If I interpret them according to Greek knowledge, all of us are up there in the sky,” Ana explained.
“Don’t tell me,” Tania said, intrigued.
“Yes, look, that one is Pegasus, just like Epona,” the Irish goddess said, pointing to the constellation with her finger.
“Can you imagine Epona with white wings in her mare form?” the Punic goddess asked sarcastically.
“Well, if she and Anpiel ever assimilated, it might look something like that,” Ana said with a smile.
Tania laughed.
“And over there is Leo, which represents you,” Ana continued.
“I’m quite sure I am not a male lion,” the fire-haired goddess replied with a sarcastic expression.
“And that one is Crow, the one that represents me,” Ana went on.
“And which one would Anpiel be?” Tania asked.
“He would be Eagle, the one about to abduct Aquarius,” the Irish goddess said, pointing toward the farthest reaches of the sky.
“Isn’t that the story where the father of the Greek gods turns into an eagle and kidnaps a beautiful young man to make him his lover?” Tania asked curiously.
“Well, I doubt Anpiel has those tendencies,” Ana said with a laugh.
“And that one is Rui,” the Irish goddess said, pointing toward the constellation Ophiuchus.
“I think he’s more like a serpent, like the constellation of... what do you call that huge serpent constellation?” Tania asked, intrigued.
“Female Hydra and Male Hydra,” Ana answered with a smile.
“Ah, well, one of those two,” the Punic goddess said.
“No, Rui is more human than beast,” the Irish goddess said, shaking her head, her face turning red.
“Yes, you’re absolutely right, Ana,” Tania replied, returning her smile, but then she noticed Ana lowering her gaze to the ground.
“I’m in love with Rodrigo, Tania,” the Irish goddess finally said bluntly.
“I already knew, but I’m glad you’ve finally admitted it,” Tania answered.
“What do I do, Tania? Should I tell him how I feel, even with what’s happening with Epona?” the Irish goddess asked timidly.
“I think telling the boy something like that right now would only upset him. I think you should at least wait until Epona wakes up,” Tania replied.
“It’s just that... something happened when I fought that self-proclaimed King of Tula, and I still haven’t told anyone,” Ana finally said, trying to look away.
Ana then told her friend about Excalibur, about how Myrddin had hidden that weapon inside her body, and how she had managed to unlock it by confessing her love for the boy; and also how she was now unable to use it again.
“Maybe with that sword you could fly, just like Rodrigo and I managed to do,” Tania said excitedly.
“I didn’t actually try,” Ana admitted awkwardly. “But I’m not able to unlock the sword anymore.”
“Do you think the only way to do it is by confessing your love to Rodrigo?” the fire-haired goddess asked.
“Yes, I’m almost sure of it, unless it manifests again in a dangerous situation, like when we faced Anat,” Ana replied.
Tania fell silent for a moment, thinking about what to say to her friend.
“It would be rude to Epona to do that now. Or really, at any time,” the Irish goddess said sadly.
“But you shouldn’t repress yourself either,” Tania replied. “Honestly, I doubt Epona doesn’t already know you’re in love with her darling.”
“Am I that obvious?” Ana asked in embarrassment.
“Far too obvious,” Tania said.
“When I brought him to the inn after the incident in Coimbra, you couldn’t stop looking at him. You rushed to take off his clothes and wash the blood from his body. Then you insisted that he stay with us, when I was only going to leave him with one arm. You even shared the little ambrosia you had so he could recover his limb,” Tania said.
“Well, I admit I found him attractive, but only that much,” Ana replied, puffing out her cheeks.
“During the whole trip to Ibiza, you kept trying to talk to him. Sometimes I felt like I was the one intruding. Then you wanted to bathe naked with him, insisting that ‘the gods do that,’ when that was a complete lie,” Tania continued.
“All right, all right. I admit it, I liked him. But one thing is liking him, and another is loving him,” Ana replied defensively.
“I suppose you started changing a lot when you were around him. Smiling more. Getting more excited about things,” the Punic goddess added.
“I admit he helped us see the world in a different way, pulling us out of our rigid routines. And in all that, I’m sure you began to see him more with eyes of love than with eyes of lust,” she concluded.
“It’s just that... I never thought I could love after what I went through,” Ana said awkwardly.
“Ana, did you truly never realize you were in love with him? Especially when you threw yourself in front of him to shield him from that giant who was with Loki?” Tania asked, puzzled.
“How did you know about that?” the Irish goddess asked in surprise.
“Athena told me,” Tania said calmly, resting the back of her head in her hands.
“That gossiping master... though I hope she’s okay,” Ana said with annoyance.
“She is. That woman plans farther ahead than we can see,” the Punic goddess replied indifferently.
“Well, about that... I really didn’t think about it. I just... did it,” Ana said, embarrassed.
“That’s love, Ana,” Tania finally said, looking straight at the goddess.
“It’s just that I don’t understand... why Rui and not the men before him?” Ana continued, frustrated, trying to understand her feelings.
“Well, a lot of men only ever approached me out of pure lust,” Tania said.
“In Carthage, there was a sailor who used to see me going to watch the ships every day, and he started bringing me gifts,” she recalled.
“Oh? A childhood love?” Ana asked with a playful expression.
“Not at all. When he tried to kiss me, I beat him to a pulp,” Tania said indifferently. “After that, no sailor ever tried anything with me again.”
“You’re so savage!” Ana replied with a look of disapproval.
“But anyway, as I told you that day in Denendeh, Rodrigo made us change and become better people,” Tania said. “I’m sure none of the men you knew ever had that effect on you.”
“Yes, that much I admit,” Ana replied.
“Listen, Ana. I know you’re anxious over these discoveries, but I insist again: wait until Epona wakes up, and speak to her first.”
“All right,” Ana said timidly.
“And one more very important thing,” the Punic goddess added.
“What?” Ana asked.
“Ana, don’t treat this like some kind of method to make yourself stronger, or you’ll only be seeing Rodrigo as a tool; and Excalibur almost certainly won’t awaken if you do it that way,” Tania said.
“Yes, I understand that,” Ana replied.
“Ana, tell me, are you jealous of Epona?” the Punic goddess asked bluntly.
“N-no, not at all!” the Irish goddess answered, hesitating.
Tania smiled at her friend and said goodbye. Then the Punic goddess jumped through the opening in the roof to return to her room.
“I think I’ll go back to my room too,” the Irish goddess said to herself, then leapt down through the rooftop opening as well.