Chapter 3: Circumstance

Sulking out of the provision house, Evelyn kept her eyes low. Shoulders drooped as each step on the loamy soil took her away. Where do I keep going wrong? Her swollen finger flared in pain as she tried to smooth her dress. Yeah… I’m done with you. Finding a space away from the Village’s many eyes, she moved to the space between the library and Trial Hall. Squatting down, she winced as she placed her thumb's nail beneath the splinter and pushed upward with a firm squeeze.“Fuck”Splinter removed, she continued between the two buildings until reaching the spigot and rinsed off the bloody finger. Her brows furrowed as she watched the cows eat. Their heads lowered as hay shifted into piles all on its own. The effortless use of magic, by animals no less, drooped her shoulders further. Moving toward the fence, she knelt and brushed her good fingers through the hay strands. How are they creating piles? She grabbed a handful and then let it trickle down to the dirt.“Emily said trust it, but what does that mean?”The straw drops but doesn’t clump as she watches it fall to the dirt. Why doesn’t it form piles when she moves it? Glancing around to ensure nobody is watching, she brings the image of what she wants into her mind.“A pile of hay, square, the size of my hand on all sides. Go.”The hay shifted ever so slightly, but not into any recognizable groupings. Instead, the small yellow strands shift about haphazardly in all directions, a few strands lifting into the air before falling. So, it is possible. Though it is not like the others. They make it seem so… easy. Sighing, she stood and walked back through the alley. Once on the other side, she turns and enters the library. Surely the library has a book on earning Grace.Evelyn walked up the wooden stairs and entered the library. Her face scrunched in distaste already. Okay… you’ll be okay… just get the book and get out. The stagnant smell of books and dust wafts toward her at the entrance. The sound of scratching and a rhythmic thump, thump, thump reached her ears. She scrunches her dress in her fist as she steps up to the counter and into the lantern’s light. Just behind the counter was a woman Evelyn knew all too well.“Hello, Sister Nima, I-is now a good time?”The older woman had a single long braid down one side. The gray hairs were the only thing hinting at her age. Her face was without wrinkles, and her eyes were as sharp as a hawk's. She had two piles of books on each side of her, and she would move a book from one pile, read the cover, then set it down on the other side. All the while, the quill would write the name onto a list without her having to touch it.Evelyn watched in utter silence, not wanting to cross the fickle lady ever again. The last time she interrupted the Tome Keeper, Evelyn was ‘incidentally’ needed to organize a shelf in alphabetical order. And it took all day. No thank you. So, Evelyn watched and waited. The scritch scratching of the quill and the thump thumping of the books nearly bore her to death, but finally the last book landed on the farthest pile. Evelyn spoke.“Sister Nima, do you have a moment?”She could feel the woman’s ice colored gaze lock onto her, and Evelyn felt the chill. She quickly squeaked out.“I can come back later… if now is a bad time?”Fortunately, the Tome Keeper didn’t intend to turn her away as she replied.“What are you looking for, girl?”Evelyn straightened her spine and tried to sound brave.“Grace. I’m looking for a book on how to earn Grace.”The Tome Keeper stood from her chair and walked around to look down at Evelyn. By the gods, she’s scary. The intimidating Nima grabbed the lamp from its holder and began down the aisles, and Evelyn followed. The Keeper stopped at the third row and waved the lantern over the spines and muttered the names of the books. She probably keeps books made of flesh. Evelyn shivered at the thought.“Here we are, girl, ‘Grace before Gods’, a classic.”Nima reached up and grabbed a muddy brown book. Evelyn took the proffered book and brought it closer to her face. The spine faded so much that it was nearly illegible. “Thank you, Sister Nima… I promise to return it in goo-… the same condition I received it.” Evelyn caught herself, wanting to avoid misunderstandings.Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions.“Yes, yes, now run along, girl, I am busy.”With the acknowledgement given, Evelyn took large bounds toward the exit. As she opened the door, she heard the quill begin to write once more. Evelyn eyed the feather with envy. Why can’t she do things like that? With any luck… ‘Grace before Gods’ will have the answers she seeks.She stepped out of the library, flying down the steps and down the dirt path. She paused at an intersection, checking each side for moving carriages before she continued. Now in better lighting, Evelyn squinted at the spine and the cover. She could just barely make out the faded letters, even in broad daylight. Yeah. Nima was a hawk.Evelyn entered her and Emily’s quarters, and she opened the window for fresh air. She took a candle and set it on the nightstand. Now it is time to experiment. She closed her eyes. Mother did this just a day ago, and Evelyn watched every micro movement in real time. Her hand reached out to the wick.Ignite for me. She snapped her fingers.No effect.Create a spark. Snap. Burn. Snap. Still… nothing.She looked at the book. Grace before Gods, huh. She sat down on her bed, opened the book, and began to read. The first few chapters are clearly the work of a churchman. It is all about sacrifice and atonement. These next few are promising, though. It goes on to explain the sensation of the Gods’ Grace as it touches one’s soul. Yeah, yeah, I get that. I already know how it feels. I want to know why. I want to know how it triggers. I want to know the catalyst, you damn-She lays the book down and reaches out for the wick once more.“Light the wick from the top.” She commands as she snaps her fingers. A thin haze radiated from the candle. As if it were giving off heat. Were her eyes playing tricks on her? Just as quickly as she felt the heat, it dissipates.A grin blossoms on her face. It is gone now, but there was definitely heat there. She was close, she could feel it.She read on, the next chapter as useless as the first few, essentially telling her to give up. “Surrender to Grace to be touched by Grace? Yeah right. That’s a paradox if I’ve ever seen one.”She set the candle on the floor, snapping at it a few times before moving it back to the original spot on the table. She took a deep breath, and she slowly exhaled and locked her eyes onto the wick. Holding her fingers ready to snap, she reached forward.She raised her voice, demanding it work this time.“Ignite the wick and leave the candle undamaged!”A spark crackled around the rim of the candle, but the wick didn’t light.She rubs the back of her neck. Nobody said mastering grace would be easy. Well, nobody else is even trying to master it. They just walk around performing miracles. Hm. Maybe the next chapter will help her with lighting a candle.Her eyes were still locked on the candle as she reached to turn the page. It should burn. What else is a wick for if not to be lit?A spark flickered in her peripheral vision. Her head whipped to the book to see an ember and the beginnings of a flame in the middle of the page. What? But how di-“NO NONONO!” She rushed forward and slammed the book closed. She held it tight to smother the small flame. Please don’t be bad, don’t be bad!She opened the book back to the page where the paragraphs were beginning to blacken.The page was damaged beyond recovery. Her shoulders slumped in defeat. “I’m sorry, Sister Nima. Please be in a good mood.”Her experiments over, Evelyn took her own ink and quill from the drawer. She then began writing an apology for Sister Nima. Left with no answers and even more questions, she closed the book and stood to return it to the library. A small sheepish smile lingered on her face as she walked to her door with the note in her hand.She paused when she crossed the threshold into the hall. Turning back, she closed the door behind her and locked it. She leaned against the door with her back. Apology or no, Nima is going to be furious either way. May as well figure this out. Evelyn walked back between her bed and Em’s. The book of Grace taunted her.“I’m not finished yet.”