Cock-a-doodle-doo!
My hand reflexively slapped my natural alarm clock. This morning I woke up in my own room, in my comfortable bed, after a long and tiring night. A peaceful silence greeted me.
My uncle and his two children returned home yesterday—at my insistence that I be alone after seeing how exhausted they were looking after me after I was discharged from the hospital. My body still feels tired, but I know I'm not truly alone.
Cluck-cluck!
I quickly pulled the chicken into a warm embrace. His head nuzzled against me, seeking comfort.
Yes, there was this feathered creature—a little bundle ready to steal all my attention, and even my money.
I grabbed my phone from the nightstand. The screen lit up, displaying the distinct blue vertical line running down its glass—a signature glitch I had accidentally caused from dropping it against a door frame.
I scrolled through every app, checking whether anyone had accessed my phone during my hospital stay, until my eyes halted on a new message notification. The contact name: Sirloin.
My heart hammered against my ribs. It was the exact same name I had seen on my ethereal phone. Only one brief sentence caught me off guard:
Don't waste your energy.
I was stunned. Syllain knew I was back, and he was watching me.
Even after breakfast and trying to distract myself with a book, I couldn't stop stealing glances at my phone.
Okay, I gave up.
My fingers hovered over Sirloin's name displayed on the screen.
That message... was clearly a warning.
I realized that energy didn't always have to manifest in violent explosions or transparent shields. Sometimes, it could remain stored inside me as raw anger and grief.
I walked into the living room. The house felt terribly empty. Every corner harbored memories—memories I had spent years trying to avoid.
My eyes settled on a worn photo frame resting on the table. It was a family portrait: me, my father, my mother, and my older sister, taken five years ago. We were all smiling in the photo—smiles that now felt like a bitter lie.
My hand trembled as I reached out for it. I stared at my mother's face, smiling warmly as though she were the happiest person on earth. I recalled her final words before she departed: "I love you so much," she had whispered in a fragile voice.
And after that... only silence remained in my soul.
Drrrtt! Drrrtt!
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My phone vibrated in my palm, but I set it down on the table. A chilling wave rippled through my body. My eyes drifted back to the photo—to my father's smile, always appearing so joyous before his new family, and my sister's smile... who never returned.
The rage and sorrow surged uncontrollably inside me. I felt that dark power waking up—the power of obliteration. I wanted to destroy that photo, obliterate the memory, and erase the past.
"The past isn't to be hated, but to be embraced and let go…"
"You must first accept it... and only then can you master what lies within you…"
My trembling hands stilled. They were right. Don't waste your energy. I couldn't erase my past, nor could I obliterate the pain. I had to accept it. I had to face it.
I set the photo back in its place. My gaze shifted toward the window. The sun was shining intensely today.
I knew I possessed my own strength now. I wouldn't run away again.
I took a deep breath, allowing the warm sunlight to bathe my face.
Yet, an overwhelming wave of exhaustion suddenly crashed over me, as if every ounce of energy I had used to contain my anger had evaporated at once. My vision gradually blurred, and the world around me dissolved into soft, shifting shadows.
I dragged my heavy steps back toward the sofa, letting my fragile frame collapse onto the cushions, and allowed my eyelids to shut tight.
Within seconds, my consciousness plunged into a depth far lower than ordinary sleep. The suffocating air of the house, heavy with memories, instantly gave way to a biting, arctic chill…
WHOOSH-FZZZT!
Bone-chilling cold filled the air. A silent wind blanketed the atmosphere. My arms moved freely as my feet glided smoothly across a frozen lake. All around me stood a silent pine forest draped in heavy snow.
One leg extended backward as I glided forward. I inspected the lake's surface—smooth, flawless, without a single crack, save for the faint etchings left by my skate blades.
Ah, so perfect…
I executed a spin, slowly lifting one leg until it touched the back of my head. The motion naturally made me tilt my head toward the sky. The zenith was painted in shades of golden blue, signaling that the sun would soon dip below the horizon.
Coasting back onto both feet, I gathered momentum for a wide approach.
SWOOSH!
At top speed, I struck the ice and launched upward, letting my body soar and spin mid-air before landing flawlessly on a single skate. My movements were fluid and graceful, like a dancer commanding an icy stage.
My arms extended wide as I straightened my posture, gliding backward. A gasp of pure relief nearly escaped my lips.
For the very first time, I felt utterly light—so free, unburdened by trauma or rage. I lost track of how long I had been skating, only knowing that twilight had not yet turned dark.
Sensing another presence nearby, I coasted to a halt.
Two figures stood at the edge of the frozen lake: one in a black robe, who immediately offered a broad, fond smile upon meeting my gaze—the other in a pure white robe, who smiled subtly with deep meaning. They stood side by side, waiting in tranquil silence.
With a radiant smile, I glided rapidly toward them. My heart overflowed with a sudden surge of pure joy. I dropped to my knees before them, my breath coming in short gasps.
White Robe reached for my fingers—a gentle wave of warmth enveloping my soul. "You've come a long way," he whispered like velvet, his smile soothing my chest. "Welcome home to yourself."
GRAB!
But before I could revel in the warmth, a cold grip landed firmly on my shoulder.
Black Robe.
The touch of his fingers on my shoulder was demanding, pulling me slightly closer to him. His dark eyes stared at White Robe with a sharp, unfriendly chill.
However, when his gaze fell on me, his touch softened, sending a wave of icy energy that bound me.
"Look who's finally stopped running," Black Robe murmured lowly near my ear, the mischievous tone returning. "You look so much cuter when you're not lamenting your fate, Ishihara."
Amidst the intertwining of these two opposing entities, their energies merged perfectly within my chest. The power to eliminate and the power to protect no longer fight, but instead lock onto each other.
The three of us sat together in absolute quiet. I didn't know why, but I felt whole. No trauma, no anger—only profound peace.
It felt as though I had finally found myself... and for now, I chose to believe that I was no longer alone.